Silence

Silence is golden. 

Silence is the true friend that never betrays.

The tree of silence bears the fruit of peace.

Silence speaks when words fail.

I read an article today on one persons experience when they took a vow of silence.   Many say this is one of the most challenging experiences of their lives.  When challenged with being silent, they go through the stages of grief and finally come to terms with themselves. Aye aye aye.

In a world of people demanding communication and discussion, silence seems unnatural.  It feels unnatural.  I dare you to try it.  You’ll see what I mean.

Yesterday I went to a doctor appointment.  My voice has been “off” since I had a surgery in December. I couldn’t get any volume and the pitch was different.  I didn’t sound like “me”....and it wasn’t getting better.   So off to a specialist I went.   Snapped a photo while I was there.

This photo was taken before he brought in the long (VERY long) tube with a camera on the end that the doctor stuck through my nose.... yes, this rubber tube went up in my nose and all the way down to my vocal chords. 😳

Going to the doctor during a worldwide pandemic is quite an experience.... probably should save that for another post.

Turns out it’s nothing serious.  But I have some ulcerations on my vocal chords.  The cause is either due to something with intubation during surgery or due to acid reflux.  I would think if I had acid reflux I would know?  There is no way to know for sure.  The treatment, as it turns out, is to be on Prilosec for 6-8 weeks (in case it is acid reflux) and two weeks of vocal rest.  No talking.  Not even whispering.  

Oh yah sure.  Just stop talking for two weeks. No problem. Piece of cake.

See.  The thing is.  That’s not easy.  

I got up in the middle of the night last night and was talking to MYSELF.  Out loud.  Then I remembered I was supposed to be silent.  And I was like “I just WASTED words when it didn’t matter”.  You would think I would want to save the talking for a time when I needed it.  Like “don’t touch that hot pan!” Or “look out for that car!”  Those seem like words worth breaking your silence for.   Not “why are there ants on the counter?”.   That hardly needs to be said out loud in the middle of the night.

So here we begin.  My two week vow of silence.  I’m not sure if I’m allowed to call it a vow when it’s a medical reason.  But I’m going to.  I’m going to embrace to monk life and experience by silence like nobody’s business.