Friday, May 23, 2008


I have to take issue with something.
Dave Ramsey... love him. usually.

But, today... I got an email from him (not because we're personal friends but because we've paid to take his FPU class)... and he had the NERVE to say that coffee is not a necessity. it is a luxury.

I'm contemplating my open letter to him. Something like this...

Dear Dave,
Although I appreciate all that you have done in your life and ministry, I have to take issue with one point. Coffee is not a luxury. How can I ask my husband to extend a special line item in our budget for Starbucks when you continue to claim that it is a luxury? Let me educate you on the value of my daily Starbucks ....

First of all, it is research... when I get the necessary funds, I plan to open my own coffee shop, and it is vital to my financial peace that I complete the research needed for a successful coffee shop.
Secondly, ... have you SEEN me in the morning when I don't have it? Do you work beside me? No... you haven't. And believe me, you don't want to.
Third, coffee improves my mental performance. If I am to succeed in partnership with my husband and our financial peace... in your class... it is vital to maintain a sharp mental capacity. vital!
Fourth, it's healthy. I know that you are not an MD...and perhaps the people on WEB MD are not either. But, the recent studies on WEB MD state that having six cups or more of coffee each day slashed men's risks of type 2 diabetes by 54% and women's 30% over those non java drinkers. It is imperitive to my costs in health insurance that I partake in at least 6 cups a day. Imperitive. do you hear me?

Dave, now I know that you are a very smart individual. I realize that you must have made a mistake. As a matter of fact, my husband, who never disagrees with you on anything... replied to my email this morning after I forwarded yours to him. He said, very simply...
calm down
calm down
it's okay
Dave doesn't know what he's talking about
He's just boof spouting off
You can have all the coffee you want, I promise.

So, Dave, you are mistaken. You must have been temporarily out of your mind to even suggest that coffee is a luxury and not a necessity. TERRIBLY MISTAKEN.

Apology accepted.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

under pressure part 2

I wish it were more glamorous. I wish it were some kind of spiritual breakthrough. I wish I could say I suddenly had an epiphany that order doesn't matter to me. If you are like me, you know how you long for it not to matter. But, the truth does.

So, I had decided I was going to lay down the law. My 16 year old hadn't been participating in the clean up efforts... my 21 year old just moved all her stuff back into the house... my 9 year old's room was in disasterous state with trailings all over the house, my husband was being a husband. I know he wanted to help and tried... but didn't fully comprehend what he could should do.

The day before I had given in. The 15 year old wanted needed to do something. It was important. And I let her go only to regret it later when nothing was accomplished on the home front. So, Tuesday night I laid down the law. No nothing. for anyone. No practices. No friends. No phone. No church. No nothing. It was school and home until order arrived. I had to do what all moms hate to do. I had to let the drama team pay the price for our disorder and not let Abb go to practice. I hated it. Everything in me screamed that it wasn't their fault, but I knew I had to do it. You know those times. I cancelled the "friend over" for the 9 year old, called the parent and calmly explained that her daughter couldn't come over because my 9 year old has chosen to ignore her room too long. Of course, the mother completely understood. So did the drama team

So, I abandoned the house for a few minutes and when I returned, I found the break I had been needing for weeks. A friend. A heavenly friend straight from God. A friend who I will call Melanie (to protect her identity of course). When I arrived at home, she was cleaning my house...side by side with my daughter and the other two drama students. They decided that since Abbers couldn't come to practice, it had to be desperate... and they wanted to intervene to help her out. They didn't stop there... they continued.... and one by one, they left... and "Melanie" stayed until after 10pm helping me get it all. done.

I wanted to kick her out.. I know she didn't need to be there. I know she had a home of her own probably in need of the same care. I know she didn't have the time or even the energy to help me out. But, she knew. She understood. She had been there before and could see that I needed a little help from my friend.

And I really did. Since she left, my whole demeaner has changed. I slept better, I relaxed some, I did my devotions without a pad of paper for "the list" next to me, I actually picked up the book I had started several weeks ago. (which totally ministered to me too).

I guess the breakthrough I had was that I realized that sometimes we just need to have someone to come up alongside of us, push up their sleeves, and help us out. We women seem to think we can't have help, but at times, we just need it.

So, all of you who relate to me... I'm comin over. I'm not sure when... but I'm comin over... and I'm bringin "Melanie".

under pressure

The last few weeks I have been a little stressed about things. Since we had the "flood" at our house, we've been recovering and trying to keep up in life with work and church and family. We've done a halfway decent job... I stress halfway. ..but I never seem to be able to get ahead enough that I can feel like I can relax. Each day my "to do" list seems to get longer, and the dark clouds of "stuff" loom like a thunderstorm waiting to happen.

I am sure that at least some of you can relate to me. I don't know what it is about me... but when I don't feel like I am gaining ground, I experience what the Germans call "angst". It's a word for fear or anxiety... but it really is much more than that. It is a word that describes an intense emotional strife. It is always there, just under the surface, when I feel under pressure. And this entire month, I have felt the presence of angst...constantly lurking.

I know that lots of people experience stressful times in life. I do not single-handledly hold the reigns of stress. But, have you ever noticed that when tension occurs in one area of life, it is bearable if you have another area that is unstrained? It seems that for everyone that "constant" is a different scenario. My constant is my home.

Now I'm admitting something you have to bear with me. I don't care about appearance to other people. BELIEVE ME. But, there is something about having my home in order that gives me peace. I have battled with why this is for years... tried to call myself a freak... and let things go. But, the truth is... I have to have order or I flip out. In recent years, I have realized that it is one of those things that stems from my childhood. Not that my mother was organized at all. In fact, just the opposite. Our family life was always chaotic in every sense of the word.

Last night, I had a breakthrough with my level of stress. I'll tell you about it the next time I blog. It deserves its own entry.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

lunch made by a nine year old

1 cheese stick
1 half roast beef sandwich with butter - no crust
1 hostess cake
1 fruit roll up
1/4 cup sunflower seeds

20 oz gatorade

I am not sure what the fork is for.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

sing your heart out

Abbers sang "No One" at the Pops Show at her school last week. She did a fabulous job. I was a proud mama.

It was sweet because we went back the next show on Saturday and I was walking in behind some other girls and conversation went something like this:

Girl #1: Is it different songs tonight or the same ones?
Girl #2: Different ones.
Girl #1: So, is Abbie singing No One again?
Girl #2: No
Girls #1: Oh bummer!! That was awesome.

I love it when people say nice things behind your back.

Photo, by the way, is courtesy of Momzie. Thank you!

I did actually take photos. It's a pretty funny story. Before the show, they made a big deal about "No Flash Photography" and so I turned the flash off the digital camera to take a picture. But, I didn't do it right, so right in the middle of her song, a huge flash went off and everyone. Really. EVERYONE. gasped around the auditorium. I threw the camera at Shanda and said "SHANDA!!" pretending she did it.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

my mother

Mother's Day is here... and my mother deserves a medal of honor this year. She really does. There have been so many changes she has experienced in the past year,... since the last mother's day.

Last fall, she had a perforated ulcer and had to have surgery twice in less than two months time. She was very ill, and nearly died. My sister stayed with her for a couple weeks and then I went to stay with her for a couple of weeks and helped her get healthy. Thank God she is fully recovered from that scary illness.

A couple of weeks ago, my mom retired. After working for probably nearly 50 years, sometimes at two or three jobs, she has officially retired. I so want her to enjoy herself and relax, drink an ice tea, and enjoy herself. She has worked very hard her whole life.

Even though I've been out of the "house" for 22 years or more, there are a few things I remember about my mom that always make me smile.

1. polyester - my mom is the queen of poly. seriously. she wore it in the 70s when it was popular, in the 80s when it was not, in the 90s when it was not, and in the 00s when it was not. basically, because I don't think it ever came back did it? Her favorite is the polyester white pants. Classic look for my mom. I love her for her polyester.

2. purple hair - much like today, she liked to dye her hair often. She died it all kinds of colors all the time, so we have a bunch of photos of her with differing hair colors in a boufont hair-do. But, in the 70's and even the 80's, hairdye wasn't as sophisticated as it is now. So, she would occasionally end up with purple hair. any hairdressers out there that can explain this phenomenon?

3. people. she loves people. any people. any people. any. she would always have someone to "help". My brothers had lots of friends in school who called her mom and would practically live at our house when I was growing up. A few years ago, we went to visit her and we arrived at her place late at night with the kids after a long car ride. She escorted us to our beds and told us to be "quiet" because there was a man sleeping on the back porch. A homeless guy they had met and felt sorry for, so they helped him get a job, and let him sleep on the porch. ?

4. dogs. my mom loves dogs. sometimes I think she thinks they are people. she doesn't mind them licking her and sleeping with her. when I was there last year, she had just acquired a mini-daschund from one of the people she was helping (see #3) because the dog didn't have a home to go to. She has three dogs. Hobie, Sissy, and Annie, are all part of her family...and i think they will probably be the only ones mentioned in her will. :)

5. lipstick. my mother taught me about lipstick. Things like "never go out of the house without lipstick", and "if you wear no other makeup, put on some lipstick". She always wore bright pink lipstick, which has caused me to hate that color I think... but I do love lipstick. hehe.

6. snoring. she can snore like a bear. not. kidding.

I inherited the best and worst parts of my mom. I proudly love people. all kinds of people. no matter what their background or history. I like dogs. not love. like. But, no way would I want 3 or 4 of them. I love lipstick. All makeup actually. I hope I never have to have purple hair or wear polyester, but I suspect my kids will say the same thing about me and my tank tops and button up shirts someday. I also recieved her horrible feet, pear shaped body, big hair, and love for a good novel.

Happy Mother's Day Mom. I love you.

Monday, May 05, 2008



1. Write your own six-word memoir

2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you'd like.

3. Link to the person who tagged you in your post.

4. Tag five more blogs with links.

5. Leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play.

Here are six words that describe me:

1. busy

2. happy

3. coffeeaholic

4. committed

5. sarcastic

6. do-er

How about this for a visual?

I don't tag anyone... I am breaking rule #4 - and then rule #5. But, if you want to join in, do it! :)

Oh wait... I take that back!! I tag Val, Cindy, Shawn, Bill, Nate, Matt, AT, Nick, Haleigh, Lindsey, Diana, Momzie.... all the people that don't have blogs or have non-updated blogs... let this be just the encouragement you need to start one or get yours updated with some kind of entry from the year 2008. :)

Oh... I forgot rule #3. Thanks for tagging me Ang and Amie...