Monday, July 26, 2010

Dear friend

Dear Friend,

Why do you come at the WORST possible times? And you seem to just LOVE to hang out ALL….DAY….LONG…. just nagging and nagging and nagging… and just when I think I’ve gotten rid of you, there you are again. And again. And again.

I woke up this morning, there you were.  You followed me to work.  I tried to get rid of you there.  I went to lunch at Hy-Vee…. you had to tag along.  I came home from work, thinking I would finally be rid of you, and sure enough, you were at my home too.

I don’t know how to politely say you ARE DRIVING ME C R A Z Y.  I like friends… I do… but enough is enough.  You need to leave. I want to have a little peace and quiet.  I am the type of person that likes stillness at times in my life, and your constant presence prevents me from having any peace at all. 

We have a rule in our home.  It’s called the three hour rule.  When we are invited to someone’s home, we stay three hours!!!  That’s it!!! No MORE!  And when we’re not invited…it’s even less.

I don’t recall inviting you.   Nope.  I didn’t.  There is no invitation with your name on it.  You aren’t supposed to be here.  You have been here too long.  You are rude and you have ignored the three hour rule.  Please leave now.

I don’t even want to mention your name for fear that you will be confused and think I want you here.  I do not so I must tell you… I am talking to YOU my friend, Headache!

Oh come on… did you really think it could be anyone else?

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