Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Abbie

Got a message from Abbie today that she is going to the doc in Trinidad.  She’s been not feeling real well… and last week she cut her finger with a knife.  It should have had stitches when it happened but it has only gotten worse over the last few days, swollen and huge… and just not. good.  She made the mistake of taking a picture and sending it to me.

What can I say except that I’m a mom?  I am insane with worry when she is ill and needs medical attention.  It was all that I could do to keep myself from jumping on an airplane and rescuing her from her perils.

I called the doctors office here and made like it was a real emergency and demanded the date of her last tetanus shot.  It was the only thing I had the power to do.  I got real crabby.  Poor nurse.

Found out that her last tetanus was in 2008.  So, I texted her and told her that.  She said it was too late.  Her last tetanus was 12/14/10.

Trusting God is easy…in theory.  I’m just being real here for a moment, but it’s easier for me to trust anything but the Lord sometimes. I trust my own abilities, other people’s judgment of me, my money, my doctor, even an airline pilot.  But God? Yeah right.

It seems insane when you actually think about it.  But, it’s easier for me to trust what I can actually SEE.  Sure, I believe in God…. but trusting Him to run my life? 

I’ve had some opportunities the past few years to put my faith to the test. Sometimes I’ve failed miserably… and other times I’ve had lots of faith.  But, it’s never been an easy thing.  It’s been a lifelong challenge for me to trust Him completely.  Each new crisis requires a new commitment to trust Him.

When I think about it, really think about it…. I know.  And I remind myself.  He loves me. He loves my kids.  He didn’t take my daughter out to the ends of the world to abandon her.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler
and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his pinions,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
You will not fear the terror of the night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
You will only look with your eyes
and see the recompense of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place—
the Most High, who is my refuge—
no evil shall be allowed to befall you,
no plague come near your tent.

For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways.
On their hands they will bear you up,
lest you strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread on the lion and the adder;
the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.

“Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;
I will protect him, because he knows my name.
When he calls to me, I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”

Psalm 91

1 comment:

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

This made me cry. I'm not sure there's anything on earth that puts our real life practical faith in Jesus, to the test, like motherhood.

Saying a prayer for Abbie, and praying He continues to whisper to your heart, just what you wrote. He's got it taken care of. :)